Surrender and Receive Your Way to Naturally Sexy

I Am WomanAs women we are instinctively programmed to be the caregiver, not the care-receiver. Women before us fought for our equality and rights. Women in the workplace have fought to perform on an equal playing field as our male counterparts. All these instances and more might have contributed to the hardening of our feminine nature. While they are all positive and honorable accomplishments, they may have altered our ability to become vulnerable and receive.

Is it possible to be it all at once, caregiver, business woman, lover, and friend? Our expert contributors tell us YES! It is. Opening ourselves up to others brings our inner beauty to the surface. We shine with a naturally sexy glow.

Take a look at the following advice on how to channel your inner peace and strength outward:

Think Goddess

“Look at images of goddesses from all cultures. Notice how much the female form is revered, appreciated, and worshiped on the planet. Recognize you are part of this lineage. Notice that goddesses come in all shapes and sizes. They aren’t all worshiped for their beauty, some for their courage, others for their compassion, and still others for their fierceness. Seeing yourself through this lens can allow you to feel your power to attract, entice, lead, and overcome. Knowing this strength lives in your womanliness can allow you also to soften, receive, and surrender without losing your potency. Let your partner know you are, “she who should be worshiped” and relish in the long line of feminine power that is your lineage.”

Elsbeth Martindale, Psy.D., Clinical Psychologist, Courage to Bloom

Allow, Receive and Adore Help from Wonderful Men

“Yesterday I saw a woman lugging a box of copies she’d made at the corner copy store back to her office. A very nice looking man dressed in a suit offered to help her. She said, with a smirk, “no thank you”. Why didn’t she allow this man to help her? Well, probably because she is conditioned like so many women to do everything ourselves, and that help from a man often comes with other expectations. This is something we unwittingly learned from a distressed and unbalanced parent, or from media models that teach us to mistrust help from “random” men. We sometimes don’t ask for, or accept help from even the men we love! When women allow, receive and adore assistance from wonderful men, we increase our internal magnetism, beauty and femininity… this is what keeps us sexy! Being sexy means knowing how to receive assistance from willing men and saying Thank You knowing we deserve royal treatment. Now that is sexy!”

Kenya K Stevens, CEO, Love Coach, JujuMama llc 

Do you think expressing our femininity is a fading art?  How do you channel your inner beauty outward?


  1. Diane Franklin

    It’s so hard to find that happy medium…either I am a helpless “Girl” or a nasty “Bitch”. I want to be the woman that can enjoy being pretty, enjoy giving myself what I need to feel pretty and sexy, while still having the power to accomplish anything I set my mind to.

    Just maybe that woman carrying the copies felt empowered by refusing help from the men. I know I sometimes feel like men don’t believe I can handle the task at hand, and I feel “put down” by their offers. I wonder what would have happened if another woman offered to help her carry the load….hmmmm??

    • Hi Diane,

      I have been thinking about your comment and I can definitely relate to that feeling of empowerment and have experienced it that way myself. But, something about that saddened me and I finally put my finger on it.

      I have a friend that LOVES making recommendations. When she finds something that works well for her, or she enjoys, she can’t wait to tell you about it! I enjoyed hearing about all her finds for many years. Then I noticed something. She never tried my recommendations or took my advice. For a while I was offended by this, but then came to realize that it is just her way. I don’t think she notices that by doing this her relationships suffer – or, in the very least, never reach the potential they could.

      So my question is… at what point does a feeling of empowerment turn into a defense mechanism? And how can we become aware when this happens? Any thoughts?

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